One of my bridesmaids and I are tasked with throwing together a really really quick joint Bachelor/ette party for this Friday night. We found out when it was going to be last Saturday night. One of the groomsmen, HB (Hey! Hey Billy!) has rented the kareoke room at the bowling alley that we frequent. Yes, this is rednecky. But it's okay. It's not going to be a blowout, but we get a private Bartender and a private Kareoke guy and basically we get to have our own little spot. BA (the bachelor) asked the very conservative Christian manager whether "Midget strippers" were allowed to be invited. This of course is a big joke, but it was funny just to see the guy sqirm a little bit. To his credit, HB repeated the story when he called several of those stripper-for-hire services and asked, "Hey, do you have any midgets?" After several "No! *click* " incidents, one person politely informed him that they offer full-sized strippers.

So LL started scouring the internet in search of moderately tasteful bachelor/ette party decorations. It is amazing what people will attempt to sell you online. There's a hopping vagina, to start and several other vulgar, common things.

Some where along the way I mentioned the lack of subtleness in these decorations and that we should go "all Georgia-O'keefe" but no one would get it.

And she's like Geo-what? And I have to stop to explain to her that Georgia O'Keefe painted flowers that looked like femine anatomy. She of course knew nothing about what I was talking about since the subject wasn't 1. male anatomy and physiology or 2. 7th grade earth science.

So, I prepared for her an email that shows some of Miss O'Keefe's handiwork.

Here's what I sent her:

"Georgia O'Keefe, an American artist, has been a major figure in
American art since the 1920s. She is chiefly known for paintings in
which she synthesizes abstraction and representation in paintings of
flowers, rocks, shells, animal bones and landscapes. Her paintings
present crisply contoured forms that are replete with subtle tonal
transitions of varying colors, and she often transformed her subject
matter into powerful abstract images.

Her early images began with organic abstracts such as Music Pink and
Blue II (1919), and evolved to a series of flowers such as Red Canna
(1923) and Black Iris II (1927)."

Personally, I feel kind of naughty when I think about Mrs. O'Keefe displaying these huge flower pictures to the artsy elite in the early 20's that frankly, looked like girl-parts. I mean, I can see her, all-Zelda-Fitzgerald,-cocktail-in-hand, asking these uppity Manhattanites what they thought of her flowers. At least that's how I imagine it.

Posted by Lux on 13 November 2007 at 9:25 AM | Permalink